Showing posts with label review. Show all posts
Showing posts with label review. Show all posts

Monday, May 11, 2009

Book Reviews


From the sublime to the ridiculous.

I've been on a reading kick lately, and since I'm a blogger I know you're all dying to know what I think about whatever.  So here are some (very) short reviews:

A fascinating story by the father of science fiction.  Part nature documentary, part high-seas adventure, it's kind of like a 19th-century underwater Star Trek.  Highly recommended.

Funny short story about the passive-aggressive office worker that won't be pushed around, and the power of behavioral precedent.  It has a poignant touch to it, too.  Good story.

A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
A popular classic is both for good reasons, one of those stories where you can call it "heartwarming" without being just an over-used cliche.  Read it.

Daemon - Daniel Suarez
It's about a dying brilliant computer game programmer that takes revenge on the world by writing what is both the ultimate virus and the ultimate computer game.  What's really scary is that all of the technology in the story exists.  It's totally possible!  I do believe this will get made into a movie, and there is a sequel on the way.  Highly recommended for nerds, geeks, other techies, or paranoid conspiracy theorists.

The son of Mel Brooks writes the ultimate survival guide on how to survive the coming zombie apocalypse.  Hint: be prepared, and aim for the head.  Great dry humor.

A Brief History of Time - Stephen Hawking
A summary of physics from the Greeks to string theory, this book is basically a recap of how man has tried to understand the workings of the universe.  It's well-written and easy to understand, although it's a little frustrating for someone like me who knows enough about the topics to have serious questions, which to answer would require detail well beyond the scope of this book.  Oh, and he repeats the usual nonsense about Gallileo (Church vs. Science!).  I have the original 1988 edition, so I don't know if this was corrected along with the changes made in later editions.  Still, everybody should read this book.

Orphans/Fugitives/Titans of Chaos - John C. Wright
Sort of Harry Potter meets Star Wars meets The Box of Delights, it's one of the most imaginative stories I've read, it's hard to figure out exactly which genre it's in.  Maybe fantasy, maybe sci-fi?  The characters are interesting, and it's just impossible to tell where the story is going to go.  One of the characters can move and see in four dimensions, which presented some difficulty for me since I visualize everything I read.  It also has the most ominous line I've read lately: "Prepare the thousand-dimensional object!"  Recommended.

Watchmen - Alan Moore/Dave Gibbons
Who reads the Watchmen?  I did, and it was actually pretty good.  I had read the whole debate about the book vs. the movie, and I already knew most of the plot (including the ending), but it was still very interesting.  What you get out of the story depends on your world view.  The point of view of the story is very nihilistic and cynical, although the characters are quite deep and draw you in.  I thought the ending was disappointing, in part because I don't see the universe in the way the author portrays it in this story, although as a whole I enjoyed reading the book.  Although I haven't seen the movie, from what I've heard it's much much more violent than the comic.  The worst violence in the comic is described or implied, and not depicted.  And Nixon isn't portrayed as evil (he's hardly portrayed at all).  Recommended for those who are interested.

Currently reading:
The Night Land - William Hope Hodgson
Set one million years in the future when the sun has burnt out (written in 1910, they didn't how long it would actually last back then), one of the last survivors of the human race sets out across a land of perpetual darkness to rescue his beloved.  It's very atmospheric, early sci-fi, and I'm only halfway through it, so don't tell me how it comes out.

Ender's Game - Orson Scott Card
A fellow geek chastised me for not having read Ender's Game, so I just started that one today.  I don't have anything to say about it yet.  Don't spoil it!

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

The Summer Blockbuster Final Tally.

Now that this mad, mad, mad, mad summer of big movies is finally winding down, we can take a step back to analyze, objectively, which one was the best. Noticing a void and filling it in his best manner, Dave put together a Reviewinator program in Visual Basic that provides a method of rating movies, taking into account that different movies are good for different reasons. The Reviewinator allows you to define categories for a movie, and weight them according to what is most important. For instance, "ability to make you cry," "touchy-feely-ness," and "David Duchovny's suaveness" might be important categories for Return to Me but not for Commando. The Reviewinator then takes a weighted average to determine the objective score for a movie. Note that a category can have a negative weighting, which indicates that it's important that a movie does not have that quality (for instance, "touchy-feely-ness" in Commando), but in all cases, higher category values are better (for instance, a category weighted -5, with a value of 10 indicates that it's important the movie not contain any of that, and it didn't).

So without further adieu, I present the final, objective, and completely inarguable scores for the summer's top blockbusters.

Review for Spider-Man 3
Overall rating: 8.56
Content summary:
Web-slinging action (weight 5): 9
Intense, character-driven story (weight 5): 10
Evil, freak-show villains (weight 5): 10
Ability to stay on a single plot line for more than 30 seconds (weight 3): 3

Review for Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End
Overall rating: 8.24
Content summary:
Pirates (weight 5): 10
Ninja (weight -5): 10
Swords (weight 5): 10
Boats (weight 5): 10
Coherent Plot (weight 1): 6
Scene in which it is revealed that after 10 years, if the Dutchman's Captain's love remains true to him, he is released from his service and a new captain is found, otherwise, he is bound for an eternity, which explains that Calypso's betrayal of Davey Jones doomed him to an eternity as captain of the Dutchman, and gives the movie a satisfying ending, wherein Elizabeth, by being true to Will, gets him back after 10 years (weight 4): 0

Review for Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer
Overall rating: 7.50
Content summary:
Superheroes (weight 5): 8
Supervillains (weight 5): 7
Action (weight 5): 7
Extreme lameness, like the first one (weight -5): 8

Review for Ocean's 13
Overall rating: 8.22
Content summary:
General Confusion about what's going on (weight 4): 8
George Clooney's suaveness (weight 3): 10
Brad Pitt's ability to make any woman swoon (weight 3): 6
Matt Damon's boyish good looks (weight 3): 8
Al Pacino's eeeeevilness (weight 3): 10
Julia Roberts' mouth the size of New Hampshire (weight -1): 10
Witty Repartee (weight 5): 7
Vegas, baby (weight 1): 10

Review for Transformers
Overall rating: 9.00
Content summary:
Awesomeness (weight 5): 10
Extreme Explosions (weight 5): 9
Crap-your-pants Action (weight 5): 10
One-liners (weight 3): 7
Ability to be appreciated by anyone outside of the 18-35 male demographic (weight 1): 5

Review for Ratatouille
Overall rating: 9.47
Content summary:
Animation (weight 5): 10
Humor (weight 5): 9
Sweetness (weight 4): 10
Pixar's Magic (weight 5): 9

Review for Harry Potter and the Order of the Pheonix, in IMAX 3D
Overall rating: 10.00
Content summary:
Witchcraft (weight 5): 10
Wizardry (weight 5): 10
Story (weight 5): 10
Shootout in the Ministry of Magic, in 3D (weight 5): 12
Quidditch (weight 1): 0

Review for The Simpsons Movie
Overall rating: 7.95
Content summary:
D'oh! (weight 5): 10
Why you little! (weight 5): 10
Aye Carumba! (weight 3): 8
*sneers* Excellent (weight 3): 7
Humor (weight 5): 8
Bart's penis, which I really just did not need to see (weight -1): -10

And there you have it, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix easily walks away as the best movie of the summer. Remember, if you disagree you are not just wrong, you are educated stupid and evil.

Also, I haven't yet seen Live Free or Die Hard or The Bourne Ultimatum so if you have, please feel free to send me a pithy and arbitrary review.

-----EDIT-----

Finally saw Bourne Ultimatum and Die Hard 4 so here are the indisputable reviews.

Review for Bourne Ultimatum
Overall rating: 8.39
Content summary:
Suspense (weight 5): 10
Action (weight 5): 10
Suspenseful foot chases (weight 4): 10
Action-ful car chases (weight 5): 10
Matt Damon's boyish good looks (weight 3): 10
Hot chick, saved by Matt Damon's boyish good looks (weight 4): 10
OMFG WOULD YOU HOLD THAT GORRAM CAMERA STILL FOR JUST ONE FRAKKING SECOND! (weight 5): 0
Hehe. I used swear words from both Serenity AND BS Galactica in that previous category (weight 0): 10

Review for Live Free or Die Hard
Overall rating: 7.76
Content summary:
Compelling villain, portrayed by either Alan Rickman or Jeremy Irons (weight 4): 0
Explosions (weight 5): 10
"I'm a Mac" guy (weight -1): -5
More explosions (weight 4): 10
Bruce Willis progressively getting the crap kicked out of him (weight 5): 10
Even more explosions (weight 3): 10
Improbable means of killing bad guys (weight 3): 5
Destroying a helicopter by jumping a car into it (weight 4): 10
Hot asian ninja chick (weight 3): 10
Hot asian ninja chick getting her butt kicked by a non-ninja punch to the face (weight 3): 10
Plot where, in the end, it does in fact end up being a bank robbery (weight 1): 7
Beethoven's Ninth (weight 1): 0

Current Earth-Destruction Status This page is Class A WWW Depricated

Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
Lilypie First Birthday tickers
All material on these pages is ©2003-2010 by Joe Belland, Dave Belland, Tom Adams, Cari Burud and/or Paul Harold except for the stuff that we blatantly stole from other sources. All rights reserved.