Searching for some YouTube vid to make me laugh at funny cats,
And reading comics of stick men, or checking for new feeds again,
I bid "later" to the fellows in the Fark IRC chat.
"Caffeine is what is really needed nothing more and only that,
Just one cup and I'd be back"
My cat had curled up so neatly purring gently and so sweetly,
Sleeping peacefully and deeply, in my warm and comfy lap,
Suddenly she was awaken, and from her slumber she was shaken.
On her feet she landed gently, rudely woken from her nap.
Curling round she started licking as she does after each nap.
I left her, fetching my night cap.
As I dreamt about my steaming coffee, she then started scheming.
A twinkle in her eye, now gleaming. Mischief's what she had in mind.
Of this I knew simply nothing. I was too naively trusting,
To think my dear and sweet, soft kitty could ever be a mastermind.
"Code monkey needs his nightly coffee," was my thought. I was too blind,
To see the foe of all mankind.
Once out of sight, she went to work. She bore her fangs. A devilish smirk,
Graced her otherwise sweet and innocent, cute and cuddly feline face.
Moving gracefully, with power, to behind my mini-tower,
She eyed the wires beneath my desk deciding which one to deface.
She glanced around, the coast was clear, now was her chance, the perfect place,
To dine behind computer's case.
She licked her chops, the drool came thickly, then dove right in, moving quite quickly,
First a bite and then a nibble, from a sweet and succulent wire.
Oh, what heaven for this kitty, to be dining without pity,
On the chewy, yummy string that was the goal of her desire.
Greedily she did devour, severing the important wire,
Thinking not of the coming ire.
Returning from the kitchen then, to dive right in once again,
To my guild's planned and purposeful twenty-five man Warcraft raid,
The kitty sprinted lickety-split, from 'neath the desk as I did sit,
And I thought nothing of it, joining the group for our premade.
Only then did it strike me, as Azeroth was displayed,
Something's amiss. I was dismayed.
I turned the volume, no sound came, I checked the settings in the game.
No problem there but still I couldn't hear a single sound from fair Goldshire.
Reaching back, I checked connections, to see, upon closer inspection,
What was the seeming defection that caused the problem, oh so dire.
Feeling round I felt a problem with the all important wire.
It was severed, that important wire.
Turning round, I saw dear furry kitty, no more sweet and purry,
Watching me from just outside the archway to the bedroom door.
The look upon her face was all I needed. She turned down the hall,
Quickly running from the impending doom that she knew I bore.
"You evil, vile, demon kitty! You'd better run" and out I tore.
"Your days will not be many more!"
Around the house, a wild route, she ran with me in hot pursuit,
Of the villain, no longer cute, who had destroyed what I held dear.
A path of violence left in our wake as I attempted to overtake,
That Hun, the demolition cat whose death was very, very near.
"I'll catch you yet, you run in vain, you only tire yourself, I fear.
For your end is very near!"
She doubled back, my legs between, and continued to careen.
She sprinted for the bed, to hide, but alas, to no avail.
Diving I slid across the floor clearing ten feet or more,
And caught the tazmanian devil, draggin her out by her tail.
"I caught you, agent of destruction, in your escape, you surely FAIL!
In my vengeance, I will prevail."
I hoisted her to my eye level, to stare her in the eye, that devil,
Who had wrought so much desctruction on my poor computer wire.
"And now my justice shall be meted, and at last you shall be treated,
For your evil plans defeated. Now prepare for punishment most dire."
I raised my hand to strike her, and to show her my full ire.
But something made my wrath expire.
She looked at me, a gaze most touching, as if to my heart, she were clutching,
Trying to stay my rash judgment, with a look apologetic.
"Sorry" she seemed to pur nervously and fluffed her fur,
Looking as cute as ever she had, and evoking a mood sympathetic.
She meowed sorrowfully while purring and while acting quite pathetic.
"Forgive me?" She seemed apologetic.
"Oh, I can't be mad at you, dear Isis, you who chase computer mices,
And sit upon my lap and pur. Just promise me you'll chew no more."
In her eye I saw a twinkling, almost as if she were winking.
She fluffed her fur and rubbed me as I set her on the floor.
"You hear my, Isis? I'm quite serious. Being mad at you, I abhor."
She meowed as if to say "no more."
