A Day in the Life.



Outside my window...is a pitched battle as my massive Imperial Fleet crushes the pitiful Rebellion once and for all.

I am thinking...this Skywalker kid has a lot of chutzpa walking in here and talking about my weaknesses.

I am thankful for...planet-destroying Super-lasers and the ability to shoot lightning out of my fingertips. That just never gets old. Fire at will, Commander!

From the kitchen...I can smell the fried Mon Calamari with a side of Bantha wafting up from the bottomless pit. Who's idea was it to put that thing there anyways, with minimal guard rails? I'm going to have to have a talk with the chief architect. The thing's an accident waiting to happen.

I am creating...aside from the Death Star itself, a feeling of hatred and anger in Young Skywalker. Soon his journey towards the Dark Side will be complete!

I am going...to crush this insignificant Rebellion like an insect! Then I'll turn Skywalker to the Dark Side, let him and his dad, Mr. Whiney-pants, duke it out and take the victor as my apprentice.

I am wearing...a dark black robe. Damn, I look badass in this thing. I mean, I normally look badass, but when I pull on the hood? REALLY badass.

I am reading...The Evil Overlord's list. Great advice for today's ubervillain.

I am hoping...we can finish up this whole battle before 4. I don't want to miss my tee time on the Endor greens. They give you a complementary Ewok with each club membership.

I am hearing...Vader taunt this Skywalker kid. Vader sure does have a sexy taunting voice. But can he cackle like yours truly? Hell, no.

Around the house...I think my Royal Guard are using the downtime to practice Rock Band for the All Death Star Rock Band competition. As if their puny band can defeat The Siths. I mean, Vader can five-star "Green Grass and High Tides" on expert, playing both Guitar and Bass at the same time. And when you throw in my awesome singing voice and epic drum skills, those guys don't stand a chance. Not like winning would do them any good anyways, because Vader would just freak out and Force-strangle them anyways.

One of my favorite things...aside from killing Ewoks, is to crush my enemies, see them driven before me, and hearing the lamentation of their women.

A few plans for the rest of the week...Well, once I finish the Death Star and crush the Rebellion, there won't be much left to do except fly around in this awesome thing terrorizing the galaxy. That and doing glitterstim lines off the belly of some hot Twi'lek chicks.

Here is a picture thought I am sharing for you...



It never gets old.

(With apologies to Mrs. Pickles. ;-p)