Ever Get the Feeling that You're Being Watched?

The (Big) Boy

Lest we forget about the firstborn, a couple Damien stories.

On Sunday, as we were rushing out the door to Mass, Damien apparently thought we weren't rushing fast enough and wanted to leave. So he grabbed me, pulled me over to the hallway closet, opened it, took my hat out, put it on my head, then ran to the front door. He knows that daddy putting on his hat is the last thing that needs to be done before we leave.

Then today, after changing him, I had left his shoes on the floor because I was in a hurry to change Anthony. Damien picked up his shoes, took them to the closet, opened the closet, put away his shoes (in the proper place), then closed the closet.

Anne Marie comments that he's better about putting away his shoes than I am.

Peas and Pods

Can you figure out which picture is which brother? (Highlight to read answers.)

Anthony on left, Damien on right.

Anthony on left, Damien on right.

Ha! Trick question. Both are Anthony.

Damien on left, Anthony on right.

Damien on left, Anthony on right.

Damien on left, Anthony on right.

Anthony on left, Damien on right.

I just pray that they grow up as close to each other as I did with my brother.

Twins, separated by two years.

A Better Pain Scale

H/T Hyperbole and a Half

Key:

0: Hi. I am not experiencing any pain at all. I don't know why I'm even here.
1: I am completely unsure whether I am experiencing pain or itching or maybe I just have a bad taste in my mouth.
2: I probably just need a Band Aid.
3: This is distressing. I don't want this to be happening to me at all.
4: My pain is not @%&!ing around.
5: Why is this happening to me??
6: Ow. Okay, my pain is super legit now.
7: I see Jesus coming for me and I'm scared.
8: I am experiencing a disturbing amount of pain. I might actually be dying. Please help.
9: I am almost definitely dying.
10: I am actively being mauled by a bear.
11: Blood is going to explode out of my face at any moment.
Too Serious For Numbers: You probably have ebola. It appears that you may also be suffering from Stigmata and/or pinkeye.

The Laboring Murloc says her contractions fall between a 4 ("My pain is not @%&!ing around") and 5 ("Why is this happening to me??"), so we're heading to the hospital now. All further updates will be on Facebook.

Place Ya Bets... Again!

Birthday: _______
Weight: _______
Length: _______

As before, 5 points for each day by which your birthday guess is off. 1 point for each ounce, and 2 points for each quarter-inch. Also, a new rule this time around: if your name starts with "K" and ends with "atie Belland" you get 15 points automatically just to make it fair for those not gifted with powers of divination. (Kidding, of course.)

As before, lowest score wins.

For reference. Damien was:
July 25th (his due date)
7 lbs. 7 oz. (best guess)
20 inches long

Anthony is due July 23rd.
The Pregger Murloc's weight gain so far this pregnancy has been less than that of her first.
Anthony really likes stretching out, more so than Damien did in the womb.
Also, Rie's OB-GYN Kenobi has said she doesn't want her to go too much past her due date, to avoid a C-section. Narrow birth canal and all. There has been talk of inducing at some point.

Our Little Boy, The Charmer

Hi!

So Damien's favorite word is "hi!" He says it to everyone and everything. Today, at Mass, he was standing in the back, next to the door, and greeting everyone who came in with a "hi!" and a wave.

He was also giving hugs to a lady in the pew behind us. Later, we might need to explain strangers and personal space to him, but right now, he's just too cute.

Update on the Little One

So Damien's learned a new word... "Yoda". We start them young.

You ask him "Where's Yoda?" and he runs and gets his little Yoda toy.

* * *

He's also putting his analytical engineering mind to work, trying to unlock the secrets of the remote. After his Mickey Mouse cartoon ends, he runs to the table, pulls out a chair, climbs on it, reaches for the cable box remote in the center of the table, points it at the TV and starts mashing buttons. He knows it's used to start Mickey Mouse, it's just a matter of figuring out how.

Top baby scientists are hard at work on these pressing concerns.

* * *

He's also learning inflections. One way to decipher his babblings is by listening for the inflection. "Duh-duh-duh?" with an upwards inflection means "May I have it?" "Duh duh!" with a downwards inflection means "thank you!" and is usually said when he's giving something or after he's given something.

He also counts, in this fashion. We started playing a game with him, where we'd count to three then drop him on the couch. Now he does it himself. He stands on the tables behind the couch (see, climbing), and counts "duh? duh? DUH!" and throws himself onto the cushions. Sometimes he hilariously rolls feet over head onto the floor. Hilarious for me, at least. He doesn't think it's funny.

* * *

Another one of his favorite tricks is pretending to drink from a cup. A few weeks ago, we were at a friend's house. My friend took a big drink from her water bottle, then set it down with a gasp of refreshment. Damien decided to imitate. With the bottle cap on, he tilted the bottle way back, set it down and said "Ahh!" He now does this all the time, particularly when the Murloc or I am drinking. We'll give him one of his sippy cups to pretend to drink out of. He tosses it back, slams it down and gasps "Ahh!"

But he still won't actually drink from anything other than a bottle.

* * *
He's also learned the throw temper tantrums. Hilarious temper tantrums. He throws himself on the floor, screams, and bangs his head on the floor. Then he really screams, because it hurts to bang your head on the floor. For all his smarts, he still doesn't have much common sense.

It's (Officially) a Boy!

Introducing Anthony William!

As it turns out, one of his great-great-grandfathers was named Antonio (Anthony), and another was named William. This is coincidental (or is it?).

We've kinda known that it was a boy since the 13-week genetics ultrasound. At that point, it can be pretty hard to tell the difference, but both the doctor and ultrasound technician were pretty sure.

Hoag is now doing 4D ultrasounds. They didn't do that with Damien.

We've had the name picked out for over a year and a half. Shortly after the genetics ultrasound, we spelled out "Anthony" on the refrigerator under Damien's name in letter magnets. One day, Damien found his way into the kitchen, grabbed the "o" out of "Anthony" and started playing with it. The Murloc barked at him, "Damien, leave 'Anthony' alone!"

I'm sure that's only the first time of many we'll be hearing that.

Ummm... don't look now, but our baby is missing half his head.

I think he already looks a little like Damien. Is that a dimple I see in his chin? We may have another lady-charmer on our hands!

Such a lady's man!

First Pictures of the Littler One

First ultrasound was today.

Coincidentally, the technician—a nice Vietnamese woman named Mychi—was the same one that gave us our first glimpses of Damien, nearly two years ago.

I had to correct the technician's spelling error. You'd think she'd know these things.

She measured this Littler One at 3.07cm and 9 weeks, 6 days.... then later at 10 weeks. That would put the due date at July 26th or 25th.

Of course, she's wrong. The Murloc knows perfectly well when she got pregnant, thank you very much. We're still sticking by July 23rd.

The heart beat was a rapid, healthy 175 bpm, barely visible as a distortion in Littler One's chest.

A month or two ago, St. John's had its ministry fair. The Right to Life ministry was handing out little pins of ten-week-old baby feet, which Damien is modeling for us here:

Fig. 1: Pin indicating the exact size and shape of the feet of a 10-week-old pre-born infant. Fig. 2: Exact size and shape of the feet of a 17-month-old post-utero toddler, for comparison. Fig. 3 (not shown): Man eating five batteries.

Littler One is almost exactly ten weeks old (depending on who you ask), so this picture gives a good comparison of the relative sizes of the two babbies.

The Toy Fairy Exploded in Our Living Room.

The Culprit

Pavlovian Babby

So a while ago, I was trying to get a picture of Damien's "Angry Baby Face". Pretty simple. I would just make the face at him until he did it, then pull out the camera and snap the picture. Repeat a few times to make sure I got a good picture.

Just one problem. Now he associates the camera with that face and makes it whenever he sees it. It's very hard to get a picture where he's not grimacing. They tend to come out looking like this:



Also, he has a toy where you put a ball in at the top and it rolls down to the bottom. While The Murloc was teaching him how to use it, she would put one in then clap while it rolled down. Now he claps whenever he plays with it.

Also, he now knows to wave "goodnight" to mommy each night when she leaves the nursery.

He's forming mental associations! He associates the sound of the garage door opening with "daddy coming home" and the words "Isis," "Bastet," and "kitty" with the cats (you can get him to make the "kitty recognition noise" just by calling to the cats).

Teeth!

Also, Puppy Butt!



(Babby Feed updated, starting here.)

A handy comparison

I Suspect...

...the purple car, in the living room, with the cardboard tube.

From Damien

Alternate caption: "The babby died. Oh well. Time to make a new one."

Babby Manual

Thank you for purchasing one (1) standard issue babby. During the course of normal babby operation, it is expected that the batteries may die. In this circumstance, please follow these simple instructions to change babby's batteries.

You will need the following items:
1x ¼" Phillips head screwdriver
2x AA batteries (not included)
1x Monkey wrench
1x Monkey
2x Plutonium reactor cores
47x Ginger-headed sailors
1x Hyper-electronic transducent geoplasmic nodal collectomizer

1. Use the screwdriver to remove the two screws on babby's back.
2. Remove the rear panel.
3. If you wish to reset babby to factory defaults, slide the Mode Selector Switch from "Play" to "Demo".
4. Insert screwdriver in reset button slot and hold for 5 seconds. Warning! Do not hold button for more than 5 seconds. Doing so could cause your babby to switch to Spanish Language mode.
5. Throw the bone.
6. While holding a rose between teeth and dancing the tango, apply lubricant to bearing "F" in diagram B-2332-54.
7. Release penguins.
8. Use duck caller to signal violists to begin slow movement.
9. Use towel with hobgoblin.
10. Insert fork a in electric socket b.
11. Slap your partner in the face, write bad checks all over the place, dosey-do.
12. Gently replace rear panel and tighten screws.

Congratulations, your babby should now be recharged and ready to go.

ZOMG!!!1!

So, I was sitting with Isis, the other day, while she ate. I heard a "thump" behind me and turned around to see my *sigh* iPhone on the floor. "That's odd," I remark to myself. "How did it end up on the floor?" Perhaps Damien, in some wild flailing move, somehow managed to reach over to where it was on the table and knock it off. I get up to check what's going on and I find this....

From Damien

This will be either a) messy, b) hilarious, or c) hilariously messy.

I considered letting the situation play out, for the fun of it, but thought the cleanup might be worth work than it was worth.

Babby Vs. Death Star.

See, this is what happens when they allow just anyone to have a green screen. Or a video camera. Or a baby. You end up with things like this:

I've had this article in the back of my mind for about 5 months now.

Study Reveals: Babies Are Stupid.

"Well, yeah, if you grab onto your pacifier and pull, of course it's going to come out of your mouth. No, that's not how you suck on it. You have it backwards. Gosh, you're dumb."

More Babby Videos!

'Cause you don't have anything better to do, right?